1. Set a timer (most cell phones have these). I suggest 5 minutes for a true newbie, 10-15 for a beginner, 20-30 for people who are looking to really give it a go. Feel free to start at whatever time and work your way up.
2. Sit in a comfortable place. I usually sit cross-legged in a chair that has a back for me to recline against.
3. Close your eyes. Hold your hands in a natural manner. I hold my right fist in my left palm loosely in my lap. Breathe.
4. I focus my gaze on the space on my forehead where my third eye chakra is. This gives my eyes a comfortable place to rest so that they aren’t wandering behind my eyelids. Try to find a natural spot to focus your eyes, possibly between the eyebrows or on the forehead.
5. Thoughts and feelings will come. Observe them without thinking about them. Don’t analyze your thoughts/feelings and don’t try to push them away. Experience them and let them go. You hold onto things by thinking about them.
6. Sometimes you will get lost in thought and forget that you are meditating. That happens. When it does, bring your attention back to the present moment. Breathe in, breathe out. Center yourself and begin simply observing again. Don’t create more waves by getting frustrated or trying to judge your meditation’s quality.
7. When your timer goes off, don’t get up right away. Open your eyes and turn off the annoying alarm. Continue to be relaxed and observe your surroundings. Look around, breathe, move slowly. Then get up. The more you take your time when transitioning out of meditation, the more the effects persist into your normal day.
Things to keep in mind:
Meditation will result in feeling peaceful and calm. But feeling peaceful and calm is not the sign of a good meditation. When you sit to meditate, you begin at the beginning. You are filled with karmas that are mental opinions and judgements you hold without realizing it. As you meditate, those karmas leave you.
Sometimes there will be a pause in the constant noise of your mental karmas, then you will experience peace and stillness. This happens during some meditations and it is wonderful. Other meditations may be fraught with distraction and worry and pain. These meditations are no less valuable to your progress. Think of meditation as therapy sessions with God. Painful or peaceful, progress is being made.
Also remember, you are not striving to attain anything in meditation. In meditation, you are returning to your Self, your original nature. That isn’t something you can attain through force but rather realize by relaxing.
Stay sharp, stay aware, stay in the moment, and be the observer of your human body and everything that comes with it (thought, emotion, feeling).
Daily meditation creates a snowball effect. The more your meditate, the better. But some meditation is always better than no meditation. Don’t let meditation become a chore. It is the only thing worth doing in your day but at the same time it never needs to become a source of guilt or hardship.
I hope this helped to make some things clear and opened the doorway to the divine flowering of the Self.
“Love is what we were born with. Fear is what we learned here.” ~Marianne Williamson
Here are a few truths I have learned about transforming fear.
This is great news and comes as a surprise to most clients. Mortal fear is the only informed fear. If your life is in danger, the fight or flight response is adaptive and necessary. However, most of the time when your flight or fight response is activated, you are not in mortal danger.
You can have an initial fear response, recognize you are not in mortal danger, and calm your mind to create clarity.
Your fear mind, or “Mafia Mind” as I call it, operates the same as the real mafia. Instead of extorting money, your Mafia Mind extorts joy and potential happiness from your life by threatening you with what might happen. A lot of things might happen and they might not, so harness the power of your intention to create what you want to happen.
Present moment awareness is essential to stop fearful thoughts from becoming your reality and dictating your decisions. Never mind what was and don’t be a fortuneteller. This present moment is unique—there has never been and will never be another. So let go of the, “well this is what will happen because that’s what always happens.”
A dedicated daily practice of stillness and silence strengthens your “be here now” muscle. Living more in this present moment will decrease fear generated “future tripping” into what hasn’t happened and “past tripping” into what no longer exists.
A John Hopkins University study indicated volunteering as little as two hours per week increased feelings of happiness and decreased feelings of depression in volunteers. I made volunteering a mandatory experiment for clients struggling with fear and anxiety and found positive results.
Fearful obsessing is very isolating. Sharing your gifts with others is the fastest way to get out of your head and into living.
Seek help from a licensed professional. Years of my own psychotherapy before and after my year of fear created a safe space for my healing.
One thing I know for sure is you have the power to free yourself from the mental prison that fear creates. Anything worth having is worth working for, and you deserve to live fearless and free.